Four years ago we said the shortest “hello” and quickest, “goodbye.” I’ve mentioned before how my greatest fear is Banks being forgotten. So I talk about him. I include him in my kid count. I have birthday parties for him – and just like my other kids, I blog his party. For my own memories, posterity, and frankly, sanity.
We’ve had four birthdays to get into a groove with Banks’ birthday. Things have a way of causing hiccups for his birthday, but it’s ok. We just take it into account for the next year. For example; this is the first year his Mylar balloon number made it the entire duration of the birthday party. (In previous years it has gotten popped, blown away, stuck in a tree, etc.)
I’ve also learned from previous years that I get over stimulated and irritated if we get there the same time as all our family members and have kids running all over the place. So this year, Danny and the boys and I got there a half an hour early to eat dinner with a little picnic and just be with our family. When our extended family showed up, I pulled out the yard games I brought. (Catch and frisbee golf.) This kept the kids occupied and from running around the cemetery.
I didn’t have time to bake cupcakes at home, so I picked some up from the bakery. We sang happy birthday and blew out the candles. Just being with family and enjoying the moment and memory of my sweet baby boy made this the best birthday yet.
Thanks for letting me share my family with you. Thanks for keeping Banks’ Emmy alive. I’m so thankful for my people who I can be vulnerable around.